Mr H "suffers with his digestion" in his words; in my words he eats rubbish and drinks too much and reaps the rewards. This is a man who will whack down a fried breakfast every morning, have at least 1 bag of crisps a day, and 3 or 4 chocolate bars a week. Not to mention the amount of red wine he consumes. He is constantly looking for an answer to his "digestive problems", but is not prepared to accept that his lifestyle might be contributing. He has had various medical investigations with no significant result, so thinks that his GP is rubbish, blaming the GP rather than himself. His latest fad is that he has decided he cannot drink coffee any more; despite being 56 years old and having been a coffee drinker for about 40 years, he has realised that coffee is the cause of all his problems, and is almost evangelical in this revelation. Every morning for the past 2 weeks he has had a cup of tea in the morning and told me with great gusto that he feels wonderful, and how fantastic it is that he has discovered the cause of all his problems. I say "yes dear" but I have heard it all before, before coffee it was bananas, before that it was cucumber, before that it was peppers. Funnily enough it's never bacon, sausages, butter or red wine!
It is all so tedious, and makes cooking a nightmare because an ingredient can move to the banned list in a day.
Today we went out for lunch, and for tea had mushroom risotto (his choice) but he has wittered all evening about his stomach being "off" and has now gone to bed at 8.30pm telling me he "feels dreadful". I promise I didn't poison him (although it is a tempting thought sometimes!!) but I will sleep in the spare room I think because I don't want to be in the same room as someone who feels "dreadful", and I know that he will thrash about and moan and groan - the spare room is my haven! I am not a betting woman but am willing to wager that tomorrow morning he will be back on the coffee, having decided that either mushrooms or rice are the root cause. Not the red wine then.
I find the melodramatics of his "ailments" so very tedious. But hey ho, it's Saturday night and me and the dog are watching rubbish on TV with a glass of wine (me, not the dog)
What I find so incredible is his lack of self awareness, he talks about a friend of his and also his sist
being "hypochondriacs" but doesn't see it in himself .
Time to hit the spare room
Hannah x
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