Mr H likes nothing better than to take something that should be very simple, and complicate it in his inimitable AS way. I find myself being dragged into his AS (or is it ArSe?) world more and more and am trying very hard to stay sane and NT!
His family (2 sisters) are big on rules and rituals, which I guess is where he gets it from. His eldest sister, I am convinced, also has AS. She rings him every Sunday morning at 11am, give or take 10 minutes. Without fail. They have a stilted conversation that lasts about 5 minutes and is mostly grumbling and moaning. I thought that the whole idea of a telephone is to keep in touch, not to be tied down with, in fact isn't that why we have answer phones and mobiles?
But mid week last week, there was a possibility that we would be out on Sunday morning, collecting our new dog, so on Wednesday evening, after a bit of consideration and worry, Mr H rang his sister to "pre-warn" her that he might not be in on Sunday. Fine, so on Thursday, the rescue rang to say that we could collect doggle on Saturday. So he then rang sister to tell her that he would be in on Sunday. Note I say "he", his sister has no interest in speaking to me, it's not part of the ritual.
We collected the dog, she is gorgeous and has settled well with our other dog. Sunday morning we took them both to the beach, but our older dog is a bit doddery now and can't walk far, so we agreed that we would take new dog out again later. So at 10am, I asked if he was ready for us to try and wear Molly out..........."well we can't go until after my sister has phoned" he said
"We'll be less than an hour" I counter
"She might phone early" he said.
I took dog and walked her for over an hour, as I left, I said "I'm sorry but I'm not prepared to run my life around when your sister phones"
On my return, he said "she hasn't phoned yet, it's 11.10am"
In my world, I would have missed out all the complicated "pre-warning" rubbish phone calls, and rung her Sunday at 10 am to say "hi, ringing you early because we're off out for a walk"
How simple is that?
And just to add to the phone call nonsense, Mr H is away with work this week, he will be home tomorrow (I just can't wait)
He has just phoned me, as he does at 9.15 every night when he's away. I can set my watch by him.
"I'm off to bed now, so I'll ring you in the morning when I get to work and I'll rung you when I leave work and I'll ring you when I'm about 10 minutes away"
Good grief! Maybe I just won't answer.
Wednesday, 26 August 2015
Sunday, 2 August 2015
Not so Great Expectations.......
What a weekend!
Mr H has again driven me to the very limits of my endurance. Over the past couple of weeks, we have had some major drainage work done in our garden, including the digging of a 12 meter deep hole, and several trenches, with the resultant mud (lots of) and mess. I, as usual, dealt with most of the chaos on my own as Mr H was away with work, and kept him updated with photos etc. On his arrival home on Friday, his reaction was just as I expected; " why didn't the contractors backfill the trench properly? Why did they leave that like that? Why didn't you tell them to......"
No mention of "well done love for coping on your own, it must have been horrid"
It's what I've come to expect from him; I know I won't get any positive response. Ever. So I've lowered my expectations, which means I won't be disappointed. Which is rather sad really I suppose, being so sure that your husband will respond negatively, that you don't expect anything better.
And it got worse. On Saturday, the weather was good, so he decided that we should work through a list of jobs that needed doing in the garden (no consultation with me, but I didn't expect any). First on the list was assembling a flat pack storage shelf unit for our garage. We got all the bits out, he started trying to fit bits together, then had a tantrum because it didn't fit. Of course he hadn't bothered to look at the instructions. I said nothing, read the instructions, and started assembling the unit, and once he had got over his strop, he joined in and we got the job done. After that, he had to have a rest, assisted by a bottle or so of wine as he was "exhausted", while I cooked the tea, cut the grass, did some washing and ironing, and walked the dog.
And so we come to today, I headed for the garden (after making breakfast, clearing the kitchen, running the Hoover over). Mr H did 2 jobs from his list, while I did 3. "I've worked really hard this weekend" he said "I'm really proud of myself, getting all those jobs done"
No more (or less) than I expected.
Hannah x
Mr H has again driven me to the very limits of my endurance. Over the past couple of weeks, we have had some major drainage work done in our garden, including the digging of a 12 meter deep hole, and several trenches, with the resultant mud (lots of) and mess. I, as usual, dealt with most of the chaos on my own as Mr H was away with work, and kept him updated with photos etc. On his arrival home on Friday, his reaction was just as I expected; " why didn't the contractors backfill the trench properly? Why did they leave that like that? Why didn't you tell them to......"
No mention of "well done love for coping on your own, it must have been horrid"
It's what I've come to expect from him; I know I won't get any positive response. Ever. So I've lowered my expectations, which means I won't be disappointed. Which is rather sad really I suppose, being so sure that your husband will respond negatively, that you don't expect anything better.
And it got worse. On Saturday, the weather was good, so he decided that we should work through a list of jobs that needed doing in the garden (no consultation with me, but I didn't expect any). First on the list was assembling a flat pack storage shelf unit for our garage. We got all the bits out, he started trying to fit bits together, then had a tantrum because it didn't fit. Of course he hadn't bothered to look at the instructions. I said nothing, read the instructions, and started assembling the unit, and once he had got over his strop, he joined in and we got the job done. After that, he had to have a rest, assisted by a bottle or so of wine as he was "exhausted", while I cooked the tea, cut the grass, did some washing and ironing, and walked the dog.
And so we come to today, I headed for the garden (after making breakfast, clearing the kitchen, running the Hoover over). Mr H did 2 jobs from his list, while I did 3. "I've worked really hard this weekend" he said "I'm really proud of myself, getting all those jobs done"
No more (or less) than I expected.
Hannah x
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